Easter, uganda style

Easter was a beautiful joy to celebrate here.  It didn't quite feel like Easter, but it was.  And with that, it was a sweet time of refreshment and remembrance.   To remember what Jesus did for me...that God did not spare His own Son...this has hit me afresh.  I would not send any of my family members to die for the world.  And yet God sent His one and only child, His beloved Son, to die for me, and all my messiness, and for all of us.  He gave His all.  He gave His heart, His flesh and blood.  How can I not respond with all I am?  He has refreshed me in that....in my being here, in wherever I find myself, it is a joy and privilege to respond with ALL of me to all of Him.  I give all of myself, all my whining and grumbling, all my sin and laziness, all my attempts at control and the ways I don't fully trust my Jesus, and I get in exchange life, and life abundant, joy, peace, beauty, rest, wisdom, provision, purpose, and so much more.  What a beautiful exchange!  OUR GOD IS SO GOOD!

Some of the highlights of Easter here:

• easter egg hunt with the preschool and Aubie the Traveling Tiger (picture to come hopefully)
• Good Friday service under the trees at Acacia
• Easter lunch overlooking the Nile River with my two favorite families in Jinja, the Gibsons and the Ives
• Getting to be a witness of Rachel's baptism in the Nile

It was a beautiful remembrance of our Risen Savior!

doING

What am I doING? Here’s a snippet…




reading: Ender’s Game. The favorite book of my friend Jed Ives, hoping reading it will provide a way to connect with him a bit more, as trying to engage a 14 year old boy is proving to definitely not be a strong suit of mine. Wanting to improve that, and since I’m not into DS or Halo, trying this.  

Radical. Never read this when it first came out, reading alongside (though lagging a bit behind) my community group at home. So far, I enjoyed listening to the sermon series more, just found it went deeper into the topics and Scriptures, but learning from this too and processing it more deeply.

The Pioneer Woman’s blog. Hilarious. Currently in the midst of the Pioneer Woman and Marlboro Man’s love story (Black Heels to Tractor Wheels)…I laugh out loud when I read this. Also enjoying her recipes very much…try this one for coffee muffins (cupcakes), so yummy!



eating: The amazing delicious cooking of Miss Cassidy Gibson, gifted chef who inspires me to want to be a much better cook.  (Along with everyone else in the Gibson family...chefs extraordinare). Cassidy has a food blog in the works and I am pumped! I’m staying with her family this week as I rest and prepare for Watoto and explore more of what might be to come after that. I have probably gained 5 pounds from her yummy food already...Ginger Carrot Soup, Basil Chicken Curry, Molten Lava Cakes...and much more. Did I mention she’s 15? How sweet is that? Rockstar I tell ya.



listening: Mo Leverett. Love this man’s soulful voice and rich lyrics. All time favorite=Onward Christians. Can’t get enough. Also love his song Louisiana. SO good. And loving Beautiful Scandalous Night. Always. Such a beautiful song full of truth. Got stuck in my head this week and I couldn’t be happier. Follow Christ to the holy mountain, sinner, sorry and wrecked by the fall. Cleanse your heart and your soul in the fountain that flows, for you and for me and for all



craving: Chick fil A and Sweet Cece’s…anyone who can figure out a way to get those here I would be eternally grateful to. But the longer I wait for them, the more delicious they will be when I return home.

 

         

learning: To know more of Jesus in the day to day, minute by minute…in the faces of children and adults and all. Just to see and know more of Him, all the time.

praying: For preparation for serving with Watoto, for preparation for living in Kampala, for guidance in the next step from Watoto and faith for whatever that is.

traveling: to Kampala soon. And went to Kenya for a day and a half with my friend Emily…so fun, but too short.


watching: old Glee and the Mentalist…a fellow volunteer, Erin, got me hooked on the Mentalist.



enjoying: The fullness of life, the rest and refreshment this week is bringing, an opportunity to just be and take in where I am, and the community the Lord has so amazingly provided here in Jinja.


missing: All of you.



Much love!!!!

Say a little prayer for me...

Hi friends! Just wanted to send a quick blog update to ask for some prayer over the next couple days.  Today was my last full day at Amani and tomorrow I'll be with the kids until their naptime after lunch (around 1 this time).  My heart is breaking...to say bye to them is going to be a time full of tears and a heavy heart.  Leaving children who have known abandonment their whole lives in some way, who are in a place where they are healing from that, and then to just be a person bringing that up again...whoa that's tough.  They've also stolen a big piece of my heart...some of them will have pieces of my heart forever....and so I'll be saying goodbye and leaving pieces of myself here. I think maybe this is a tiny taste of what it is for a parent to say goodbye to a child not knowing when they may see them again...cannot imagine how hard that is because this is really tough.  So if I could just ask for you to join me in prayer for protection of these kiddos hearts, for comfort from Jesus for my own heart, and for a focus on our Jesus who is making all things new in the midst of this crazy world with hard goodbyes and broken people trying to figure out how to love Him and love others....the redeeming work of the cross is my only hope and assurance.  I rejoice as I cry, and I am thankful for sweet prayers to Him from us all...they are heard, they are felt, they are a swete aroma. 

Much love.

Just this step in front of me

There is something the Lord keeps calling my heart back to…over the last few weeks, and more so than that, through the last season of my life. Through graduation from university and all of my friends moving all over the country (and world). Through moving home, working as a waitress with a college degree and being asked all the time, sometimes with judgment in the tone, most of the time just with curiosity, “Oh, didn’t you graduate? And you’re waitressing….?” Through wondering myself sometimes, “What am I doing? Is this really the Lord’s calling or is this my making up what I am “called” to? Am I being crazy? Maybe this is good crazy?” Through praying through coming here, seeking wisdom on where to go and when, and support raising. Through living life in Nashville and loving the community He brought...and then through having to say "See you later" to that community.  Through being here and all that has entailed. His call continues…
Through the last year, and more loudly the past month, He keeps calling me.  He's calling me to faith.  He keeps whispering to my soul, Come, follow me.

To trust what I cannot see, to leave behind my fears and questioning and simply take the next step in faith. Even when it’s hard, even when it may not make total sense or be fully funded or be perfectly planned out, or whatever makes sense in the world’s eyes. To take that step. To trust what I do know in the face of much unknown. Come, follow me. To walk forward with Him, to follow the path laid before me by my Jesus, even when all I see is the very next step. To keep my eyes on Him, not on the mountains ahead or the things I fear may be in the way or may come, but to follow my Jesus. To follow Him through the hard things and the beautiful things. To choose faith, over and over. To choose it for my life, but more than anything, to choose it day by day, moment by moment. I can’t get through my days and know more of Him and glorify Him when I choose myself, when I choose to focus on frustration or things I don’t understand. I can only get through and point to Him as I live when I choose to focus on Him and to trust His ways…to trust His leading, to trust His timing, to trust His goodness, to trust His promises He gives me in the Word. Come follow me. To choose faith. And to find delight as I choose faith, because with that choice comes freedom and indescribable joy. Because when I choose faith, I choose Jesus, and I leave myself behind. I am less, He is more. Come, follow me.

He has been calling me to this in so many ways recently. Through the circumstances around me which can sometimes be overwhelming. Through Jesus Calling devotional. Through the Word, specifically Hebrews 11. Holding onto this and sitting in it right now. Through the messages at the church I go to here. Through this amazing message from John Piper. Through the ways support continues to come in. Through the days He carries me. And more than anything, through this beautiful song my dear friend Sarah McCary wrote. It’s called Faith. She recorded it just for me to carry with me over here, along with a few other amazing songs. The first time I heard it was in her kitchen during one of our weekly breakfast dates. It made me cry, for it was so my heart at that time. In recent weeks, it has brought me such comfort and spoken such truth to my soul. It’s not available for all of you to hear (yet), but maybe the lyrics will speak to some hearts like they have to mine. I really could just have posted these lyrics and nothing else and you’d hear my heart as of recent…

Near-sighted; hoping for a glimpse of where I’m going

But I’ve decided that I will follow You without knowing

Cause I believe Your promises are true

That my inheritance is found in You

So I will leave behind all the places I have been

And I will follow You even when…

I can’t see the ending, just this step in front of me

That You are calling me to take

Your will for here and now is clear

To step out of my doubt and fear

To hear Your voice and to obey

Moving forward; finally okay that I can’t see too far ahead

Cause what I’m moving towards is not a place,

No, it’s knowing more of who You are instead

And seeing that Your promises are true,

Finding my inheritance in You

So I will leave behind all the idols I have held

And let the living God reveal Himself…

I can’t see the ending, just this step in front of me

That You are calling me to take

Your will for here and now is clear

To step out of my doubt and fear

To hear Your voice and to obey

And my faith will have its failures

But Your promises remain

So all these questions without answers fade away as You guide me with Your grace

I can’t see the ending, just this step in front of me

That You are calling me to take

Your will for here and now is clear

To step out of my doubt and fear

To hear Your voice and to obey

You are calling me to faith

He is calling me to come and follow. To choose faith. A faith like Abraham’s, to follow even without knowing where I am going. To follow His promises. And so, I choose to listen for His voice, and to choose to take the next step in front of me as it becomes clear.

My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me. John 10:27

update!

So, the last few weeks have been pretty busy and I've been a little bit sick the last few days, and because of all that, I've been super slack on all forms of communication...sorry about that!  Here are some pictures to help tell the story of the last few weeks, I am working on getting another post up that's more in depth....although they say a picture's worth a thousand words, so these are worth a lot I guess...so, here's what I've been doing:

Getting a front row seat to see some beautiful forever families united as a number of adoptions occur here, the closest to my heart being that of my dear friend Michelle (who I worked alongside with for 147 Million Orphans) and her husband Mike, who will be bringing another Uganda treasure home to Nashville from Amani!  Here they are with their sweet boy...

Having too much fun on Water Wednesdays...favorite activity day of the week

Simona and Jacob slip'n'slidin...the aunties have just as much fun as the kids!

Getting to know the market, working on my bargaining skills.  The vegetables and fruit here are SO cheap and delicious!

Loving on little bittys and learning how to use baby slings : )

Playing with the parachute...roadtrip down memory lane to elementary school PE every time this gets whipped out. The kids love it (see faces above).

Laughing at silly signs like this one....don't you want to go see who is up there?

Helping teach preschool to little bittys like this...teaching them how to write their letters, how to write their names, and lots of other fun things!

Taking William, the little boy who has stolen the biggest part of my heart, for a painting lesson and just getting to show him some extra love : )

Visiting my new dear friend Megan in Kampala with the other 3 volunteers I've become good friends with!  Bottom row: Megan, Hallie, Rakul; Top row: Me, Simona

Spending most of the day on the Saturday when we went to Kampala at this gorgeous pool, getting a few hours of precious relaxation time and sweet friend time. So needed and refreshing.

Figuring out what to do with toddler and preschool age kiddos when it rains most days of the week.  The rainy season is in full swing, and so we're having to get creative.  The ever classic balloon tied to the ankle game where you try to pop your friends balloon proved both hilarious and the cause of many tears. Probably a one-time only game for this crowd..

We've been reading lots of books.  Here we have The Very Hungry Caterpillar, always a crowd pleaser : )  Our most favorite book is The Jesus Storybook Bible ...thanks sweet Leigh!!! We read it every day in preschool!

Kidsitting with Hallie for my dear friends here, the Ives. Such a fun weekend!

Overall, loving on the Amani family...Mamas, Uncles and children!

So, that's some of what I've been up to! Along with loving Uganda, following my sweet Jesus, and of course missing all of you! Much love!

A Love language

I’m sitting in a circle with twenty five children ages 2 thru almost 5, and we’re singing songs. The children are choosing, one by one, a song to sing. One little girl asks to sing Blessed Be Your Name. It’s been a song she’s chosen the last few days. And those little voices start singing along with their aunties:

Blessed be the name of the Lord

Blessed be Your glorious Name

You give and take away

You give and take away

My heart will choose to say,

Lord blessed be Your name

And I realize I’ve never heard anything more beautiful or heart rending…all in one song that I’ve known for so long. It’s been a song that has spoken to my heart before, but never like this. To hear the voices of orphans lifting this up…there are hardly words. Though they may not totally get it, they sing it, and they sing it out. They choose it, day after day. Children who have had much taken away. Children who could choose a very different tune. And yet this is what they sing. They sing a song to bless His name. They sing it out with their hearts. In the hurt and the pain and the joy and the beauty, they sing. Never has this song been more beautiful. Never will it be the same.

A week when I feel lonely, frustrated, and all over the place personally and spiritually, and I’m in a place where I get to choose to serve, and how to serve…with an attitude of love and joy or one of frustration and weariness. I wish I could say I always choose love and joy. I don’t. But He is working in me there. And as I’m walking through this week, we sing this beautiful song at Bible study called Empty Me. It’s new to me since being here, and I've heard it a couple times now. It’s becoming a theme song in my heart.

Holy Fire burn away my desire for anything that is not of You and is of me, cause I want more of You and less of me

My sweet sister sent me the newest Passion album to download. It is SO encouraging my heart!  New and favorite worship music.  Such sweet goodness.  Have gotten to listen to it with the other volunteers and jsut praise our Jesus. Go check it out if you haven't yet.  Let it speak to your heart.

 

To me, music is a Love language, and the Lord is weaving it throughout my days here.  I hear Him and I know His Love through music. Thank you Jesus for that beautiful gift!

Blessed be His name. Forever.

Overflowing abundance

Ok, so I don't want you to think all my blogs are going to super serious, make you cry ramblings...the last two have just been where my heart's been walking through, some heavy stuff. This one will hopefully balance those...thanks for still reading!

In the midst of heartbreak and heaviness, our Jesus brings such beauty and blessing. I serve a God who has conquered death, the God who is the the Giver of Life, and who promises me life abundant when I follow Him, even in the hard places. Maybe most in the hard places. I know that when I am in the hard places, I usually find myself nearest to Him. Right where i most want to be, always.  And there I find the joy and abundance so much more rich.

So, in the midst of seeing and walking through these hard things with these beautiful kiddos, I have had the most joyful beautiful blessings of community and laughter raining down on me...

Community is something I prayed for, longed for, and knew I needed coming here but wasn't sure if/when I was going to find it. Oh my silly disbelief. The Lord has brought an abundance of community...friends who are here committed to living their entire lives here, friends who are here from 2 months to 6 months, friends with whom I have hundreds of connections but never met until Jinja, friends who are just passing through but who have been a part of my life in Nashville long before Uganda...Sisters and brothers who share my heart for justice and loving people well and loving Jesus most, who are working for the Lord in all different ways here in Uganda. It is beautiful and delights my heart immensely! I get to go to a Bible study on Tuesday nights with some amazing new friends here, grab coffee or lunches or just hang time with friends during the week, and live with and serve alongside some amazing sisters. He has not only brought community, He has brought it in abundance!

Laughter has come in many ways. From dance parties with the kids to water gun fights, crazy African dances to silly songs and silly moments with the kids and with friends. There are some crazy things that happen that at home would have weirded me out, but here make me just laugh...kids finding a wall to pee behind while out on a walk because there's nowhere close we can go into...using bug spray to drown the ants attacking my purse...having to order 8 times because everything I order is out...having a goat ride in the back of my friends van with us...and on and on. These things here I just laugh about, because honestly, they are so not a big deal. Mostly I laugh with the children, and it soothes my soul. He is not only bringing laughter, but bestowing it in abundance.

This song has become a new favorite thanks to a dance party at a friends house a few weeks ago with her kids to this song, which provided lots of laughter, and it has now been brought to Amani to provide even more fun and laughter (we used it for the letter W--Waka Waka--and for S--Shakira...haha). Here is a peek at our dance parties...don't be too jealous : )